Apples, Apples, Everywhere.

This fall I have eaten more apples than ever before. Why that is I am not exactly sure, but I think my body has recognized the exquisiteness of the local apples this season. I have found myself reaching for one and putting it to my mouth nearly every time they're within reaching distance (very often in my line of work). I surprise myself each time as I'm acutely aware of the fact that this is very uncharacteristic for me; however, I've learned to let my body decide what food it needs. Right now, it's apples.

You see, I grew up in Oregon's Willamette Valley and honestly, I remember eating more lemon cucumbers (as if they were apples) than I ever remember eating apples. True, I was raised in a farming family and we grew a lot more vegetables than fruits. Apples were available, but not ever present as they seem to be here in the lovely state of Washington. In fact, since moving to Washington in 2006, I have been introduced to many varieties of apples that I never knew existed. Delicious revelation if I do say so. Just today I bought a new variety for the store that I've never seen before, Arkansas Black Apples. I can't wait to taste/see them come Friday!

Here's the thing about my current apple consumption that I find most intriguing: contrary to my past habits of rarely, but generally eating Fuji, Pink Lady, or HoneyCrisp apples, I have not at all been selective when reaching for apples and I've eaten every variety we have in the store with no real rhyme or reason.



Local organic varieties currently available that I've been enjoying include: Spitzenberg, Nickajack, King David, Spartan, McIntosh, Empire, Elstar, HoneyCrisp, Winter Banana, Rome, Winesap, Early Fuji, Golden Delicious, Jonathan, Jonagold, Jonamac, Braeburn, Cameo, Granny Smith, and Gala. It is my personal belief that once the mouth is introduced to the vast array of apples, a red delicious will never be eaten again. Yes, I said never. Although red delicious apples store relatively well, their flavor is vague except for the skin, which just tastes, well, not good.

Although I have been eating and enjoying each variety in its own right, I am particularly enamored with King David and Spitzenberg Apples. King David Apples have a crisp texture with an unreal, complex flavor. The flavor is so unreal, in fact, that it almost seems artificial. If I had to choose an all time favorite, King Davids would win hands down. Spitzenberg Apples are dense, aromatic and spicy, and they are known to have been Thomas Jefferson's favorite apple. Spitzenberg Apples have a unique color and at the right time of day, while still on the tree, they actually look aglow. I wish I had a picture to share this amazing sight. It's simply beautiful.

Moral of the story, grab an apple, they're dang good this year. Try one you've never heard of before; expand your idea of what an apple is and what it should taste like. If you want to learn more about the different varieties available including best uses, storage, and flavor characteristics here is a detailed site all about apples. Warning: prepare to be blown away by the extensive variety of apples that exist.

This is what I love about food, my perception of what is, is constantly expanding.

Life is delicious.

I am a writer.

**Fine Print.. I was working on this post at the end of May when my macbook was stolen, which further delayed my return to the blogging world**

Two days ago I set myself free, free to write confidently, lively, and openly. Free to write without self judgment or self doubt. Free to let my words create their own form.

The truth is that I have had a hard time posting lately, not only because I have very little spare time, but because I was my own greatest barrier. My previous posts were painfully pulled from my fingertips; I was excited with the subject matter and generally happy with the end result, but I have been frustrated with the process.

Technical writing being my main experience, I had put myself in such a box that I could barely function. I didn't know everything that I was going to write in this forum before I started writing and as such my previous writing techniques were ineffective and confining.

Example. In college when writing papers, regardless of the length or subject (mainly political science, philosophy, economics), once a sentence became formed it remained the same; as each paragraph was finished, it was finished and not revisited. When I reached the end of a paper, I did not need to go back and check for spelling or grammatical errors. I understood what I wanted to communicate, I understood how my thoughts, ideas, and sentences would connect and flow both logically and powerfully before I ever started writing.

I am confident in my technical writing skills although I'll admit they could use some polishing; however, I held a significant amount of self doubt concerning my skills in any other form of writing. In retrospect, I realize that I held the belief I would fail at any other form. I realized my err two days ago. I was driving, and suddenly I thought, I am a writer. I couldn't stop smiling. Finally aware of my self doubt, I became ready to shed it.

Self Doubt: "A lack of faith or confidence in oneself."

It is disconcerting, deteriorating, and debilitating.

What good comes of self doubt?

Nothing. Nothing good comes of self doubt.

At this point in my life that is what I believe. Self doubt simply restricts expression, learning, experience, growth, and joy. Who wants that?

I intend to be a confident, dynamic, changing being as I continue to learn to live and to love. I will do it joyfully. I will dance in my endeavors. I will misstep, but I will accept it as part of the learning experience. Today, I have chosen to leave self doubt behind once and for all. If I am intrigued, I will question, explore, and experience. And then I will write, because hey, I am a writer.

In my experience, the quickest way to learn to become/do 'something' is to accept that we are already on our way there. We may be in the stages of learning to become, but even as we change and grow, we already exist as some form of what we intend to be. I am a writer now, even as I continue to learn to express myself better. I believe that we hinder the speed of our learning in this way. We realize what we want to be, but we don't let ourselves believe that we are it until we can do it in a way that satifies our "perfect." Why can't we be it throughout the process of learning as well? I guess I can say that I've learned to get out of my own damn way.

Of course, my mother would be thankful to hear that no amount of confidence will lead me to believe that I should express myself by singing. When I was in 3rd grade and trying out for a lead part in a school singing performance/play, she cried. Trust me, she had a reason to cry. I was terrible, but I sang it like I believed it. She cried out of love. Even though others may have been laughing, she was proud of me.

Honestly, I had no idea I was that terrible. She didn't tell me. Her love for me likely couldn't bear to break my spirit. I retained that fearless confidence throughout my youth. In the past months, this fearless confidence is what I have been working to regain. For now, I'm going to focus on writing: on scratch paper, in books, in a journal, online, anywhere I feel compelled.

Is there something you've hesitated to do because you've already decided that you can't? Can you let yourself try and fail, and try again? And enjoy the process, knowing that you're learning?

Set yourself free from self doubt. Love and accept any expression that may come, even if it means feeling like an awkward teenager sometimes as I'm assuming I will often in my early stages of writing freedom.

Writing is a way of saying something out loud. In both written and verbal expressions I find that the 'something' becomes a little more real and a lot more attainable.

What is your 'something'?

Say it out loud, even if you're the only one who's listening.

Love.

pb & j, reconfigured.

At Fresh Abundance there is a new gf raw breakfast cookie that is made of germinated raw almonds, germinated gold flaxseeds, medjool dates, thompson raisins, and purified water. I sampled one immediately when they first became available. It was delicious, hearty, and not too sweet: the perfect amount of energy to start a day. Ever since that first bite, I couldn't stop thinking about how tasty it would be with a little peanut butter and jelly on top.

raw breakfast cookie
I am not really a person who loves sweet foods. I mean, they have their place, and I can definitely appreciate them, but in general I will more often choose the salty/savory option. This new treat, however, this is divine. The perfect amount of sweet. I could eat it for breakfast or for dessert. Yum.. and it's so good for me. Next time I think I'll try some almond butter or sunbutter to switch it up.

pb & j raw breakfast cookie
Since 2005 when I was diagnosed as a celiac, I have mostly lost my appetite for bread. Sure, I love a good bagel. That will never change. But bread, I just don't crave it like I used to. Lack of bread cravings aside, this cookie with pb & j may be better than it's traditional counterpart. The heartiness of the cookie, it almost mimics whole wheat bread crust when reconfigured. Unlike with wheat bread though, the cookie provides a diversity of of nutrients, protein, and energy without any shortening or refined sugars.

I shared this combination with Arelya, the FA raw chef, and her response was priceless. I wish I had a video camera as I find that really good food often takes away our words and leaves only sounds of expression. Between bites and sounds of enjoyment she said, "This inspires something deep in my soul."

I smiled.

Yes. Love. Food.

The best part. In the last week I have walked into the Fresh Abundance Kitchen many times to spy a pb & j reconfigured. All Arelya can say is, "You did this to me."

Yes, maybe I did. You're welcome. Enjoy.

Wellness Begins Here

The past few weeks have been like a roller coaster; I have been hanging on and enjoying the ride. I am so thankful for where I have unexpectedly landed. After a good month camping in the woods I have moved into a little apartment on the p.e.a.c.h. farm.

Of the many reasons this is an exciting move, I am most enamored by the fact that I have an oven and stove. A full size oven and stove people!! You see, I haven't had the pleasure of cooking with these lovely appliances for the past three years. How did I manage? I have no idea, but I made it work...with a hot plate and a small toaster oven. Because I am a severe celiac, I make 98% of the food I consume so this was no small feat.

My new love

My first night in the apartment I boiled water to make tea. I couldn't even believe how quickly the whole process occurred. Seriously, I was in complete awe at how fast it all happened. Quick boiling water and an oven big enough to hold a baking pan have given me the itch to cook. I have a feeling this is going to be a very delicious summer; living on a farm, cooking what's ripe and fresh, and sharing many meals with friends.

Wellness begins in the kitchen, and there are surely good things to come.

Fresh Plates

Lunch. It was so delicious. Eating fresh plates (where I assemble my meal as I eat) makes me happy. A fresh plate leaves no room for poor quality ingredients as there is nothing to mask or boost their flavor; each item selected has to pull its weight in freshness and taste. Today, I received the first farmer call saying that local salad mix was ready for our plates. Yippee! Our growing season is beginning! I decided to celebrate with a fresh plate, as I look forward to local tomatoes, cucumbers, and squash, which will encounter my fresh plate again soon, very soon. In addition to eating simple, fresh ingredients, I enjoy the idea of a fresh plate because I like to be present and aware of what I am putting in my mouth. It's so nice to stop and allow all my senses to enjoy the food that fuels me, and I find that a meal that requires using hands facilitates it well.

Raw Rosemary Flaxseed Almond Crackers, Smoked Turkey, Raw Sharp Cheddar Cheese, Avocado, Sweet Onion, Red Bell Pepper, and Green Leaf Lettuce.

Well Fed

Lately, my copious (read: little to no) amounts of free time have been forcing me to choose between working, running, reading, eating, or blogging. I may have been writing infrequently, but rest assured... I have been well, and as always, I have been eating well. Not a surprise, given that I am surrounded by good food at work where I can make something for myself in a dedicated gluten free kitchen, or I can select from a variety of prepared foods when I don't have the time or inspiration. As the seasons change, I don't find myself lacking inspiration to create good food for my belly but I do find myself sometimes lacking the time. Luckily, Arelya has been constantly producing new raw foods from the Fresh Abundance deli, which of course, I am always happy to sample. I mean, someone has to do it, right? Gladly, it's me.

Raw Foods Pesto Pasta and Red Bell Pepper from Fresh Abundance. The noodles are made of zucchini! So good.

I have been really into making sandwiches lately. Sandwiches with fresh spring onions. Yum. As the seasons change, yellow, red, and white keeper onions aren't looking so pretty or firm this time of year. Luckily, we have fresh spring onions to take their place. I have also been enjoying a handful of basil leaves added to the pile of greens that take residence on each sandwich I devour. I just can't seem to get enough greens as my body asks for them over and over again. Ingredients: Sesame bagel, Roast Turkey, Pepperoni, Raw Sharp Cheddar Cheese, Red Spring Onions, Red Leaf Lettuce, Fresh Basil, Vegenaise, Black Pepper.

This next one comes from the lovely Nicole. If you ask me, it's a great way to enjoy the last of apple season until we welcome summer apples to our plates. Ingredients: Sesame Bagel, Smoked Turkey, Raw Sharp Cheddar Cheese, Red Leaf Lettuce, Two slices Pink Lady Apples, Vegenaise. Simple and delicious.

Regardless of how busy life gets, I know that engaging my body in motion is imperative for me to feel well. This week I have taken many beautiful runs. Unlike many who run in the morning, I seem to only make time after a long days work, right about sunset. What a beautiful time of day. Lately, I have found myself halting my run at unexpected moments not because I'm tired, but because there is so much beauty to be seen; I just have to absorb a little more. Here is a glimpse of the beauty I've experienced when exploring Spokane on foot.

Spokane River from the Centennial Trail

On a side note, I am aware that the iphone pics are less than stellar. I will be working on dusting off my camera and putting it to use. This may pose a challenge though, as I already have a hard time waiting to eat food long enough to take a picture; I will learn. A worthy challenge of course, I mean really great food deserves accurate photo representation, right? .

Destination: Portland, Oregon

In the wild and crazy life I lead, necessity found me traveling to Portland, OR a week ago on Monday evening for a whirlwind 24 hour trip. I expected to see my lovely family, and to take care of some necessary appointments; I didn't expect to be greeted by a bounty of readily available gluten free foods. Portland has never treated me so well, and our love affair has been going on for years. Traveling as a Celiac is probably one of the biggest challenges. I live by the rule that if I can't guarantee it's safe, I choose not to eat it. Being hungry and well is better than being fed and sick.

Dad had called me first thing Monday morning warning me not to eat dinner as he had a special treat planned for us. Yes, my entire family LOVES food, and it is often premeditated before ever consumed. Dad and brother J picked me up from the airport at 7:30 on Monday night and we headed straight for the Corbett Fish House. Dad is a fisherman and a Celiac, and this place is his idea of the perfect meal. Being the daughter of a fisherman I have been spoiled my entire life, eating only what we caught. After a few years living in the Inland Northwest, I jump at any chance to consume fresh fish. I don't often eat fried food, but Corbett Fish House is a Celiac's dream if you're looking for this sort of thing. Nearly everything on the menu is gluten free and clearly labeled as such. The only exceptions are the sandwiches as they have yet to find a gluten free bun, and the croutons on the caesar salad. They use rice bran oil and a light dusting of rice flour for all their products, and dry cooking techniques to seal and steam the fish so the finished product has almost no oil: a delicious and healthy serving of fish with a crisp exterior and succulent interior. We started with an appetizer of calamari, a favorite of mine. I was having a hard time choosing between the halibut fish and chips, and prawns as both came highly recommended. The waiter kindly offered to split my order to include both. Yes, that is exactly what I wanted. It was so good. They also offer a few different gf beer options, a great accompaniment to fish and chips.

After heading to McMinnville to see family and sleep for a few short hours, we were back to Portland at 6am for an appointment. Afterwards, Mother and I were hungry and in search of breakfast. To my delight we found New Cascadia Traditional - The Gluten Free Artisans, a dedicated Gluten Free Bakery. This place was amazing... and the very first time I have ever set foot in a bakery where I could choose any item I desired, knowing that it would be completely safe and incredibly delicious. I LOVE a good bagel so I chose the multi-seed bagel. Toasted in an oven and slathered with cream cheese. It was so perfectly hot until the very last bite. When something is really good, I find myself unable to get a picture as I am in awe of it's smell and taste, and I must eat it right then.

With a satisfied belly, I picked out some treats to take home with me. I have not had bread that tasted this good since living in Italy and eating the glutenous stuff. Mother insisted that I take a treat for the plane as well, and although I'm not a person who loves sweets, I indulged her and chose a brownie. Superb choice.

Cheddar Parmesan Bread, Multi Seed Batard, Portland Sourdough, and a Brownie

After Breakfast we headed to Hawthorne Blvd for some shopping. Hawthorne Blvd is one of my favorite places in Portland to browse: tons of second hand shops, neat boutiques, coffee galore, and of course, Powell's Books. We spent most of our time in Powell's and after looking through the entire store, we were notified that they had a second bookstore a couple doors down dedicated entirely to food and gardening. I was in heaven.

Looking at books about food always makes me hungry. To our delight, we found the Oasis Cafe on Hawthorne. Gluten Free pizza, yes please! The dough is not made in house and they satisfied all my questions on how it was handled, using different utensils/pans to avoid cross contamination. We chose the greek pizza, set it on a bed of baby spinach and drizzled it with olive oil. So good, again, too good to get a picture. Being a Celiac, eating out means that you have to clearly ask for what you need and be willing to choose another restaurant if those needs can't be met. It's a lot of work, but the only option. I was so thankful to enjoy so many great meals in Portland this trip, and to feel well after eating. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Portland. I will return to eat again.

Building Relationships

A dear friend of mine gave me a pair of boots in college after he had been teased that they were girl boots. I love this friend, and I am even more thankful that he chose me to be the recipient. I have worn them well; I love them, I live in them. Time had taken it's toll. Get a new pair you might say? No way. These boots have too many memories.

This week I set out to find a cobbler who could repair my beloved boots. I didn't have to look far. Two blocks from Fresh Abundance, I stumbled upon Ressa's Shoe Service. On Monday, I was ready to let go of my boots long enough to get them repaired. In the afternoon I dropped them off and was told they could be ready by Wednesday. This was great news to me.

Tuesday at about 5:30pm as I was pulling up to Fresh Abundance after my daily evening errands, I received a call that my boots were ready. Yippee! I went straight there. About two minutes later I was walking into the lovely shop. I didn't even have a chance to pull out my receipt when the kind gentleman grabbed my boots, smiled and said, "I matched your boots to your face." I smiled, and said "Thank you." They were more lovely than I remembered, sewn and polished. In my awestruck, I failed to get the gentleman's name. I now have a cobbler to call on when in need of repair, and I will gladly recommend Ressa's Shoe Service. Quick repair, good work, and happy people who clearly love what they do. I am all about supporting people who do what they love and do it well. I believe that living our passion is what builds vibrant communities, and what makes our world a more joyful place.

Happy boots, Happy girl.

Brain Food

For nearly the past 24 hours I have been editing/writing a huge federal grant proposal for p.e.a.c.h. (people for environmental action & community health 501c3 nonprofit) that has to be completed by 8am Thursday. Wow. I love this type of work, and I gained superb technical writing skills in college, but wow. My brain hurts in a good way. Grant funding is really important for supporting the great work that p.e.a.c.h. is doing in our community in 2010 and beyond, and I am the final editor/writer. No pressure, right?

On any given day I will gladly take this sort of a challenge as I find joy in capturing the essence of what is trying to be communicated, and in finessing an argument so that it exists in it's most powerful and concise form. This week, however, in addition to packing, moving, long runs, and all the other things I seem to fit into a normal days work, I have found myself to be incredibly hungry and in need of some serious brain food.

Here's what I came up with today. This is really out of the norm for me, but I listen to my body and this is what it was telling me it wanted to eat. So simple and so easy to prepare. I haven't eaten hot cereal since I was a child. I've never really liked it, but this was so dang good. Although this was super tasty in itself, I think that next time I will add some cardamom or cinnamon.

Ingredients (all organic except the oats as I haven't found organic gluten free oats):
GF Steel cut oats
GF Rolled Oats
Dried Blueberries
Dried Cranberries
Dried LOCAL Cherries
Raw Almonds (not roasted rather, all almonds are pasteurized to some extent unless you get them direct from a farmer who is bucking the system)
Raw Pecans
Raw Walnuts
Raw Pumpkin Seeds
Golden Flax Seeds
Chia Seeds
Redmond RealSalt
Raw Blue Agave

Mix all ingredients except chia seeds and agave in a bowl. Pour boiling water just to the top. Cover and let sit for 15-20 minutes, mix in chia seeds, add agave (or honey) to taste, and enjoy. This can be made the night ahead and consumed cold.. it would still be delicious and a great resource for someone biking many miles needing to replenish.

Although these are the ingredients I chose, you can really use any combination of grains, nuts, seeds, and fruits to suit your taste. Go easy on the flax seed as too much can become gooey and create the wrong mouth feel. For non-celiacs, I would recommend substituting rolled oats with some rolled emmer or rolled spelt flakes.

Chia seeds are something new I am trying. They can be added to casseroles and baked goods, sprinkled on cereal, yogurt and salads, or stirred into beverages, soups and sauces. Chia seeds are a nutrient-dense super seed with high fiber, 3x the antioxidants of blueberries, more calcium than milk, more iron than spinach, a great source of protein, and the richest known vegetable source of Omega-3 fatty acids.

After this lovely meal, I think I can get this grant finished by tomorrow. Thank you, delicious and nutritious food.

Routine

What do you do for yourself daily to be well?

For me, it's drinking green smoothies and running. Well, almost daily on the running as too much of a good thing isn't good at all.

There's one thing I've learned thus far on my journey of eating well to be well: Don't choose anything that is "healthful" just because it is healthful. If I don't enjoy it I will never sustain it, and I will torture myself in the process. Thoughts and feelings are powerful, as well as the chemicals released in the body associated with them. If I'm putting something "healthful" in my body, thinking it will do me good but dreading and resenting it in the same moment, I have to ask myself, doesn't the power of those negative feelings negate any good it could possibly do for me? It seems to me that there are a multitude of foods that can accomplish the desired benefit I am seeking, so if one option doesn't suit me, I keep searching until I find one that I enjoy. Win, win.

Green smoothies have been part of my daily routine for about eight months now. I love them and they make me feel great. I start each morning with one, and I drink it first, before choosing coffee. Often, I find that I only choose coffee for the taste and not for the wake me up effect as green smoothies wake me up plenty. The truth is that I have always loved the taste of coffee, and we serve delicious Maya Earth Organic Coffee at Fresh Abundance. So good! I could go on about Maya Earth but I'll save that for another post.

So, what the heck is a green smoothie and why is it so healthful you may be asking?

Victoria Boutenko is the author of the concept of the Green Smoothie and she has written many books. You can check out her website at http://www.rawfamily.com/

Green smoothies are comprised of leafy greens, ripe fruit to sweeten, filtered water, and a cup of ice. Different than other smoothies, green smoothies don't include any starchy vegetables (i.e. carrots, beets, broccoli stems, zucchini, cauliflower, cabbage, brussels sprouts, eggplant, squash, okra, peas, corn, or green beans) because starchy vegetables combine poorly with fruit in terms of the digestive process. You can use any green such as lettuce, chard, kale, collards, spinach, or beet greens to name a few. Green smoothies taste like fruit, but my body gets all the healing power of chlorophyll from the greens. (Chlorophyll's healthful properties are too extensive to go into here as it really requires an entire post *see Victoria Boutenko's book Green For Life to gain an extensive knowledge). Because I've been drinking green smoothies for awhile, my taste buds like them to be very green and not so sweet. As a runner, I also like to add young organic coconut water to my smoothies. Young coconut water contains potassium, magnesium and many trace minerals. It is a lovely balance of electrolytes that helps my body replenish after a good run.

I haven't been sick with a cold or the flu in longer than I can remember. I have definitely felt my body fighting sickness and I have found that increasing my green smoothie consumption to at least a half gallon has helped my body fight sickness off. In addition to green smoothies I should mention that sleep is also a key component for me when my body is fighting to be well. So far, so good. Sickness averted.

Although I intend to eat a balanced, healthful diet each day, I am often a woman on the run and getting a safe meal for a celiac can be a challenge. With green smoothies I can smile knowing that I've fed my body a base nutrition that it needs to be nourished and to rebuild.

What is Food?

Food is sustenance, food is pleasure. Food feeds our bodies and souls, and brings us together in a moment with the people in our lives to just stop, relax, appreciate, rejuvenate, and enjoy.

I have always been a lover of good food. My mother taught my brothers and I to cook at a young age and as a family, we always ate together. Mother taught us basic techniques in the kitchen, and she taught us to let ourselves be free to create and to learn from our experiences. In the kitchen there are no failures, only opportunities to learn and insight to be gained about how to try something differently next time.

I love to cook. I mean, I really love to cook. I especially love to share food that I have prepared with people who I care about. It is how I show love. Love that I have dreamed, created, and prepared just for the moment that we will share.

Most of the greatest memories I have all include good food. Birthdays growing up when we'd go to Alexis, our family favorite Greek Restaurant in Portland. Traveling through seven European countries with my mother, eating our way from town to town. Studying abroad in Italy and preparing the freshest ingredients I could find daily at the local produce shop, bakery, or meat shop that were right near my flat. I could go on and on.

Five years ago, I thought for a moment that my love affair with truly good food was ending when I was diagnosed with celiac disease. After the brain fog cleared a few short days after eliminating gluten from my diet, I started feeling like myself again and was able to see being gluten free as an adventure I would willingly embrace. I have never looked back. Although my love for food has changed markedly throughout my life I do not see being gluten free as a barrier to enjoyment. Instead, I see a world of food options that prior to my diagnosis I didn't even know existed.

My mother is lovingly nicknamed the "cook without a conscience" as her food ALWAYS feeds the mouth and soul, but sometimes neglects what is best for the body. As someone who lived in a chronically ill body for many years (while consuming gluten), I choose to feed my body first. Thanks to mother and years of cooking and experimenting, my taste buds don't mind this choice one bit. Eating for life can taste good. Join me as I continue to learn to eat to live.